Sweater Shoes

I dream of a world in which a person’s shoes do not necessarily indicate that same person’s age.

This is a relief since just yesterday I dreamt I had a baby and then I misplaced it.
But let’s focus on the shoes. We’ll find ol’ dream baby later.

To be fair, my pursuit of ageless footwear was but an afterthought. You see, it was the promise of unprecedented heel warmth that stirred me to ask for a size 10 before calmly settling for a size 9.5.

Scroll down, please. Take a close look. Examine even. Do you know what you are seeing? It’s a heel sweater. 

Oh, you may proclaim, “No one needs a heel sweater!”

And then I may ask you to stop yelling.

Or you may ask, “Why would I need a heel sweater?”

And then, well, I must ask you, “How can you deny yourself the joy of a heel sweater? Have you ever even considered how cold your heels must feel? Everyone focuses on the toes. Sure, it would be difficult to walk without toes, but I must say the same for heels. Do you not agree?”

And then we would likely agree and I would begin to tell you more about my dream for ageless footwear.

Just think of a world where these shoes might say more than “Damn, how do I keep forgetting to get a new library card?”

They might say, “I had gin and a granola bar for breakfast.” Then, they might show up to work and yell, “WHO ARE YOU LOOKING AT? WHAT KIND OF COFFEE IS THAT? IT SMELLS PRETTY GOOD.”

You don’t know.

I’m in the bathroom stall. Quick, how old am I? You don’t know.

I dream of a world in which Keds invites every owner of sweater shoes to a conference and sure, we’d probably start with a fun icebreaker about our favorite movies or what we like to do when we’re sad, but then we’d quickly move on to other discussions. And really, we’d all just be hoping we never have to leave our shoes at the door. That’d be really confusing.

Sweater Shoes

I dream of a world in which a person’s shoes do not necessarily indicate that same person’s age.

This is a relief since just yesterday I dreamt I had a baby and then I misplaced it.
But let’s focus on the shoes. We’ll find ol’ dream baby later.

To be fair, my pursuit of ageless footwear was but an afterthought. You see, it was the promise of unprecedented heel warmth that stirred me to ask for a size 10 before calmly settling for a size 9.5.

Scroll down, please. Take a close look. Examine even. Do you know what you are seeing? It’s a heel sweater. 

Oh, you may proclaim, “No one needs a heel sweater!”

And then I may ask you to stop yelling.

Or you may ask, “Why would I need a heel sweater?”

And then, well, I must ask you, “How can you deny yourself the joy of a heel sweater? Have you ever even considered how cold your heels must feel? Everyone focuses on the toes. Sure, it would be difficult to walk without toes, but I must say the same for heels. Do you not agree?”

And then we would likely agree and I would begin to tell you more about my dream for ageless footwear.

Just think of a world where these shoes might say more than “Damn, how do I keep forgetting to get a new library card?”

They might say, “I had gin and a granola bar for breakfast.” Then, they might show up to work and yell, “WHO ARE YOU LOOKING AT? WHAT KIND OF COFFEE IS THAT? IT SMELLS PRETTY GOOD.”

You don’t know.

I’m in the bathroom stall. Quick, how old am I? You don’t know.

I dream of a world in which Keds invites every owner of sweater shoes to a conference and sure, we’d probably start with a fun icebreaker about our favorite movies or what we like to do when we’re sad, but then we’d quickly move on to other discussions. And really, we’d all just be hoping we never have to leave our shoes at the door. That’d be really confusing.

Posted 2 years ago

About:

This is a fashion blog written by a former tomboy turned shopaholic.

Following: